Crow to your DOOM

of food for your thoughts. They are beautiful to look at; their jeweled plumage brighter than any artist’s dream. They are cute when their bellies bulge with eggs in the autumn. You can listen to them singing all through the day and night and wonder who taught them to whistle so wellBirds give you a lot . They grab your
attention as they go about their inquisitive way, poking here and there, addinga branch to their nest, or gathering grains. Birds are amazing creatures if you allow your mind to wander freely like them.

But they can be nasty too. Crows especially. No wonder they are usually featured as the familiars of witches in most fairy tales alongside ravens and vultures. Just looking in their oily black eyes will creep you out of your mind for the rest of the day and the better half of the night. And their lack of control over their faecal practices add to their obnoxiousness.

Whenever I look at a crow I get the feeling that if they were not bird-brained then they would have formed armies and attacked us en massé for food. They would have taken over the task of terrorism. Want to scare a human into letting go of his tasty sandwich? No problem, just shoot out a readymade bomb out of your ass and then be off with the stolen treat.

I really do not like crows. Do not like their dull black feathers, their creepy dark gazes, their conspiratorial flocking on treetops, and especially their exploding backsides. To me they are the cockroaches of the bird kingdom. Nasty with a big N.

Earlier I was okay with crows. I ignored them like most people, still do mostly, but I am warier of them now. The incident that took place yesterday has clawed off the veil of ignorance over my eyes, burned to ashes the neutral ground I used to hold:-

Whenever people have a few holidays in the middle of a school term, they usually stay up late at night chatting on Facebook or other such social networking sites. I was no better.

We had two holidays in the middle of last week. And so it wasn’t surprising that when we had to get up early again on Saturday to get to our morning lectures, most of us turned off our alarm clocks and kept on sleeping for half an hour more. The result being I had to rush like mad in the meager time left because of my foolishness.

Somehow I managed to get ready with ten minutes to spare. It was enough to get to class on time but not for eating breakfast at the FOODCOURT. But my friend, the one with whom I always go to class, wanted to eat something. So we made a quick detour to a nearby shop where she bought sandwiches for the two of us.

By the time the shopkeeper produced the sandwiches, I was ready to climb over the barrier and claw at her just to speed her up. Anyway, once she handed it over we hastened our steps since we had now successfully wasted eight more minutes.

That’s when the aerial attack took place. One minute I was munching into my hot chips sandwich and the next I was protecting my head as a crow clawed at my scalp in an attempt to scare me into dropping my food. I might have done just that if it had attacked from the front but its stealth backfired on it since I never saw it coming.

And so instead of screaming and running for the hills, I ducked and protected my pieces of white bread. No one comes between me and good food.

The crow was unsuccessful at snatching my sandwich but it left a lasting impression on me. It raked its dirty, gutter traversed claws through my hair! My pretty short hair! The nerve of that thing!

I was furious at it even more when we had to return to our hostel since the class had already started and the teacher wasn’t admitting any latecomers (Damn the college policy!).

And now that I have declared war on the dark creatures, they better beware. Next time it will be me throwing bombs at them. Bombs of stone obviously, what do you think I am, a tribal?

DOOM THE CROWS!

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